I think it's been awhile since we had one of these threads. Over the years I've come to the conclusion that DSM owners are a unique 'breed' to say the least. Lets compile a list of actions/things which are fairly unique to us DSM owners.

You know you own a DSM when:

- you use the tripometer as a way to determine if it's cheaper to have your car towed back home or to your destination if it were to break down

- you post on a message board when automotive tools are on sale

- you have an 'alias' so you can register 2 different CAA accounts

-When you start thinking of repairs as rental fees to drive the dsm for another few months...

Atleast for me...

When you worry because your car has been running fine for the past few months.

When you are driving by yourself and start to think, "What would happen if I broke down.... HERE"

When you wonder what will break next.

- When you make sure you're not talking on your cel phone TOO much when travelling so you safe some battery life just incase you need to call a tow truck.

-When you wonder what it would be like if you never owned one.

When you keep craving a dsm again even though all your logical senses tell you to stay the hell away from them, just as a heroin addict will never ever be completly cured.

Scotty and Ryan got it dead on. ahahhahaha

When you check to make sure that your car is idling steady at the right rpm every week or two. (I have never visually checked the idle rpm in any other car I have ever owned, yet I have and do religiously on each of my DSMs I've owned)

When your buying replacement parts, for parts that haven't broken 'yet'.

Paul

When you work for Chrysler and spend your whole pay check at the parts counter!

When your parts guys feel so bad they start giving you things for free.

- When you have CAP's and Mitsu on Speed dial on
your cell right after CAA.

When you have enough spare parts to build another DSM!

When you can never auctually say that your car is working the way it should, just "ok for now"!

You know your a hard core DSM owner when your car breaks down on you and you know what the problem is before you even come to a stop just by the sound of the noise it made.

When you can change your timing belt in less then an hour!

-You call your road side assistance package which is a part of your insurance company and you have to tell them you are on a road in Cayuga and your car has mysteriously blown a clutch into a million pieces.

-The guy on the other end of the phone asks if the car is AWD and what times you ran today (not so good when it's your insurance company asking).

When you down play your problems so your car doesn't look so terrible and unreliable.

- when you frequently enjoy a game of "name that noise" with others in the car.

(It's a good game and never gets old as there are always new noises.)

- when your girlfriend/wife never gets suspicious when your home late from work because she knows its only because the DSM broke down AGAIN!

When you belong to a kick ass member board and when a posts like "You know you own a DSM when..." comes up, there is a big turnout of answers.

When the board goes down and it's like all DSMer's are lost without it.

- When you buy another DSM with the intention to part it out, but keep most parts because they haven't been changed recently.

When you put beatdowns on 10+ year newer sports cars, and aren't the slightest bit surprised in doing so.

Your a dsmer when you have spent 1000's of hrs working on them and enjoy them still.
And I like what Nathan said

"When you keep craving a dsm again even though all your logical senses tell you to stay the hell away from them, just as a heroin addict will never ever be completly cured."

That descibes Matt Toeppner. to a t as well as a few other members hahaha. Its a sickness that cannot be cured easily.

When your girlfriend insists on driving her car to weddings because the talon COULD very well not make it.

When two of this semesters teachers have told you they wanna take a ride in your car, without you ever telling them you have one.

When you know it takes 7.5 minutes (in moms car) to get to the closest parts shop. 18 on a bike with a backpack.

-When you have a 'backup' car that you use for when your DSM is busted. It's not as nice or fun, but at least it's reliable.

And Nathan got it right on with me. My Talon spun a rod bearing, it sat in the garage for months and now I'm putting another engine in it because I miss her so much!

Thats the best one yet

...when you're watching TV and a commercial comes on with a guy and his GF in a DSM, and the CEL comes on and the car dies in front of a wedding store...and instead of laughing at the commercial, you feel genuinely hurt that they used a DSM.

-When your car kicks so much a55 just by reputation alone, that hondas/kias/hyundais are always revving at you, wanting a chance to prove to themselves and their 'peeps' that their d*cks aren't as small as we all know they are.

-That you know deep down inside, that all cars; EVEN hondas and toyotas have got their share of problems, but damned if your car doesn't look a whole lot sexier than theirs when up on jackstands.

-When every day you secretly hope for a letter in the mail from Mitsubishi saying: "Sorry about the bad run of cranks, we'd like to buy you an Evo VIII to make up for it." (okay, maybe that's just MY wish.. )

I wish for that too!!!

I busted out laughing when I saw that commercial, casting director did an excellent job casting the right car.

SO SO TRUE. I put a part in my car today and the smell brought back memories just like those commercials when he leans on the car...

When you save money for mods and buy them right away even if they sit for a year because you know as soon as you do something else will break...

When you can see the logic in building another engine for a back-up... just in case

When you get annoyed when people talk about their fast probes and hondas :rolleyes:

Matt

When You, and Your Car is Broke.

When your mom feels so sorry for you, she pays for your CAA membership

When you get the mechanic's discount at the parts store, even though you work in an office.

When you're buying a new house and the location depends entirely on how long it takes you to walk to the nearist parts store.

...when you have 3 different parts managers on speed dial in your cell phone.

...when you call up Eastway Chrysler and Adam Clay says "Hey Kevin!" even before I say "Hi"

When you have a computer, heater and insulation in your garage.

When the cost of repairs exceed the value of the car by 10 times in one year and your friends always tell you, "Wow, you could've bought 10 talons!".

lol. Wow and haven't we all heard that a million times before. They don't understand though.

...your 2-ton hydraulic jack finds its home behind your passenger seat.

...complete strangers refer to your housing complex as "where all thoes mechanics live".

...you curse because you can't find the 9/16" socket that you were using in place of your misplaced 14mm socket.

...you first drive another car, and have difficulties because it is not necessary to heel-toe a stable idle.

-You only carry a Palm Pilot to log your engine's data.

-before racing someone, you 90% of the time know their engine, hp, and performance specs. and you usually know if you will win or not

-right before u start modding, some damn matainence thing breaks down

-Every tire shop/parking garage/car wash/repair shop guy stalls out when he lets out your ACT 2600 clutch.

-If a junk yard to you is an upgrade yard.....

-If everytime you launch, you can't see the damn road all the way through 1st gear (AWD

-you walk around the house going "sssssssss pssssssht" "sssssss psssssssht"

When you give up on reliability and buy a Honda.

BS, DSM's are reliable...

-When your friends make fun of your talon and they say no way in hell they would ever own a dsm and a few weeks later buy one.

You know who you are .

When you'd rather drive your wife's Jetta TDI because it has heated seats, and more importantly:
47+ MPG.

Oh Snap! Give us a name so we can bother the $hit out of him .....j/k

Best Christmas present ever!

-you spend more time on the boards than you would care to admit in public

I'll second that. I've done that!!!

hahahah... I thought i was the only one.

Amen to that one! Perfect description of my Talon. Whenever someone else drives it they tell me my car stalls a lot. I just tell them it doesn't happen to me so they need to learn to drive Pisses them right off.

When you fart your friends say 'boostttttt'

When you've read all of Waldo's indestructible thread....Haha


Oh ya sorry. Also when you have read the other thread.

When you only get half PO'd when you see some German wannabe fling a riced up Talon into the air because the new VW has kewler built in rice (German Rice?)

The chick's kinda hot...though...blonde, tall, legs...what was this thread about??

When a 12 second grocery getter isn't enough...

When you start to time your self to see if you can beat the last time you changed a Tbelt on a DSM!
I did my buddies on his 2G GST in less then an hour. But no water pump. The 2 belts and tensioner. And no bolts left over!

......you know all the other DSM'ers in your area.

Your g/f want that u sell your car because is always broken, but when your are riding with her and you go WOT and have 20psi or +, u see the smile on his face

His face? something you're not telling us about your g/f?

her face, lol sorry, big mistake hehe

when your GF hits you in the middle of the night cause your calling out your car's name during your dream, instead of hers.

At least it didnt happen during sex!

Thats so true! I get jobber or better here in town! Saved me lots of money! Thank god! (I fix computers and they know it too)

When you take out the local honda boys for a ride and they nearly piss their pants. (All who have been in a low 12s civic)

Your turn the stereo down every 5 minutes to see if there are any new noises.

I do that all the time.

Guilty as well.

you give your mom a 30minute spiel with a lot of "don't worry about" and "if this happens call me asap" before lending her the car.... and then start preparing all your tools ;/

funny cuz it's true!

^^^
That's one of the reasons I haven't put my stereo back in the car since last summer... Why bother when I only listen to engine music anyways

Sadly this is true for me too

I can't hear my car while driving, so theres no point in turning the radio down... =)

Stereo? I can't hear that over my tires or exhaust anyway.


You have to give a lecture to the mechanic on how to properly pull your car into the bay and then explain why it didn't shut off after he pulled the key out.

The only crome you have on your car is where all the rubber has come off the trim peice below each window.

When you check for oil puddles under your car it's not a check for if there is one but rather how big it is.

You have the following in your trunk just in case:

-a quart of motor oil
-a full rachet set
-not just a jack but 2 jack stands
-a spare IC coupler and clamp
-a wooden dowel (used to diagnose a problem or prop up your hatch)

You have the following in your garage/basement just in case:

-a spare tranny
-a spare head
-a spare transfer case (maybe that's just me)
-engine stand
-every part you've ever replaced with an aftermarket part
-print outs of at least 3 VFAQs
-full resupplies of all fluids needed for your DSM
-a car cover for those extended down periods

You know you have a DSM when I am on your speed dial and I have your credit card number "on file"

Well i e-mail you atleast once a week, that count?

You scare little old ladies right off the sidewalk with you "EXPLODING" blow off valve.....Sergio....LOL...I love that thing!!

When you have owned a DSM for 2 weeks and have already personally talked to 3 different members on the phone for "Why is this doing this" and "What do I do when this happens?

When your friends call you and tell you about a Talon they saw at a wreckers you haven't been to yet cause they you will go rape it within 3 business days.

When you go to Wasaga beach or Grand bend for the day and you take the GF's car cause you actually want to get there this time!!!

Weeelllll, I was cleaning/organizing some crap and thought about this thread.

You know you own one when:

You keep ALL extra parts, be them suspension, engine or interior in hopes of selling them on the board.

You belong to 5-10 different boards for the above mentioned.

Some of the dents on the car are from you.

When you go to a huge annual event in Ohio with a bunch of other DSM's, you organize to see who's bringing which tools, the jack, the jack stands, the extra transfer case, the extra axles, another clutch plate/disc, extra valves, a timing belt, a timing light, oil, coolant, extra throttle body sensors, another MAF, a rear upper control arm, Tranny fluid, T-case fluid....

When you can connect the wiring harness on your engine in under 2 minutes.

When you have to tell passengers "Don't worry about the smell of gas..." or "The passenger door window doesn't work" Or "Mind the grinding/clicking/rattling".

When you are going through all your parts, realize you have doubles of EVERYTHING, and think to yourself "Man, I must be a DSMer".... Then quickly jump on the board to harvest up an old thread about "You know you own a DSM when..."

Hmmm a personal one from me is....

You've wasted the time of someone experienced when you ask them about an alternator belt...

I got to apologize to alot of people for that...

"Is your car finally fixed yet?"
...yea its been on the road twice sence i last saw you.. its back in the garage for a week.. (meanwhile its really tales appx. one month+.. )

Don't forget the spare alternator.

When you get to the end of the track and say, !$%@ that was a shitty launch! That times going to suck!
Even though you just roasted a Corvette.

When it takes 2 hands to roll up a window, 1 to push the button and 1 to keep the window in its track while helping it up! (1G thing)

YES!

when part of your spring cleaning involves removing the black stain on your driveway from the exhaust splat left from cold starts.

^^^ Or the oil from your dripping Turbo Oil Return.

when you work in an office but still have grease under your finger nails almost everyday no matter how hard you scrub them with that orange stuff...

Trick is to scratch your nails in the Orange cleaner.

Or clip your nails, you bunch of slobs

when the same week you finally get your engine dialed in good, the transmission starts to crap out.

Old toothbrush to fix nails up

When you look for a hill to park on were ever you go in fear that your car wont start and you will have to push start it.

you park strategicaly because you have 2, 4, or R, and dont want to have to ask a friend to push the clutch while you manually pull the shift cable into R under the hood..

i've recently invested in a nail brush, thank you very much.

also, when you carry more tools around with you in your car than you do in your garage.

short of an engine swap, i have enough tools in there to handle pretty much anything.

I hope they are light-weight tools

Bahh, they aren't. Jobmate and Mastercraft. I have a nice big tool bag with EVERYTHING short of a jack, as well as my 1/2" torque wrench.

ya, i have an extra 100lbs or so of tools (incl. a FULL jack and 2 foot socket wrench)

sucks when you have street parking. it's easier to carry them in my hatch than to lug them to my car each time i need them (often).

When you tell someone you own a Talon and the first reply is always.....So you are a pretty good mechanic then!!!!!

When you never want to park in a friends driveway that is paved or interlocked cause you are guaranteed to get your ass kicked for the oil stain.

When you go on a road trip and luggage is kept to a grocery bag because you need room for every spare part short of an engine block and the tools required for such an operation.

Everyone knows you were at the party the next morning because you left your mark on the driveway..

Ha ha, you should see where I park on my driveway.

I thought of another good one:

You are constantly telling people to not worry about that sound your car just made.... (bov, shutterbox, driveshaft hangers loose)

or the gun shot backfire..... lol

The good old John Candy back fire in Uncle Buck....

When you carry a two ton jack, stands, toolbox, clutch slave cylinder rebuild kit, 1700 Peak Amp 12 Volt Jump Starter, every fluid just in case and a fully charged cellphone.

When you carry your laptop cause when your battery dies you need to set your dsmlink again.

When you hack up an exhaust shield to protect your alternator because it keeps dying and when it dies you make it home with voltmeter reading of 9volts.

When you try not to drive when its 30+ because you dont want to overheat your car.

When you set off every alarm on your street.

When your parents driveway is turning into a sand box (fluid leaks).

When you run out of space for parts and your beaters a temporary shed.

When you run out of 200k CAA tows and know you assume your bro's name.

When your parents are constantly telling you to sell your car and buy a honda.

When you have 5 grand of upgrades,
And Sven offers you $400.




... If you'll deliver it.

lol

... hes serving in the army.. cut him a break.. lol

Oh man, army or not, that was one of the funniest things I've read all week! I can't stop laughing...

One day I will have childern, and I would like Michael to raise them for me.

He's not army. He is working with civilian contractors doing general labour at hq

MM I maybe be a civilian contractor yes.. I maybe have offerd that YES.. But really. WOULD ANY OF YOU GO OVER TO SUPPORT OUR TROOPS, ANYONE OF THE AGE OF 18 WHO WISHES TO GO OVER AND THEN COME BACK PLEASE DO SAY I WILL GET YOU A JOB... O AND ALSO I WASN"T ALLOWED BACK BECAUSE I SHOW SIGNS OF PTSD... So really why don't you all lay off.. Like i got my slap in the mouth. I have stopped. and now you guys carry on. I think personal i carried out something good. I went over volunteering at the age of 18 got hired by DND to go over. Went an cleaned someones brains out of a tank. 2 of my friends got blown up and got bombed for 2 days and had a concussion from one of the bombs. So would anyone else like to speak?. Because If this is just like that bullshit LSS forum from kingston where everyone talks here but when i go to them in person it's choke choke choke. I will have a sit down talk with you over some coffee if you wish!

Thanks
Sven

How come you got bombed? For 2 days?? Arn't you with cancap? lol even some of my buddies who were on force protection never had that much heat. I was pretty sure that cancap guys stayed within the walls since they had no combat training whatsoever. Thats why I'm suprised you even heard an ied go off.

Sorry for the loss of your friends. What country were they working for?

EDIT: Cleaning out human remains from tanks??? I'm REALLY suprised that they let civies anywhere near that scene..

Canadian. And they send rockets into the base line. and there are gun fights 3kms outide of base all the time.!

I know about the firefights. FOBs have it a lot worse

If you dont mind me asking, what were the names of your buddies that died? Some of my guys there may know them.

Cpl Brent PVT KEVIN, Not disclosing last names. they were KIA in a bison on april 8th 2007 ROTO 3 Kevin RECCE SQUAD AND BRENT INFANTRY

I know about them. Tragic loss

(ps, you can disclose last names, its been public for a while)

Yes I know But I perfer not too.

I am also sorry for the loss of young lives, but also still tired of the "poor me, I was shot at" stuff. There are a lot more people killed on our own roads each day...how about some pity and respect for me because I have to go out there and drive on our dangerous roads each day? I could sit down and tell you about crashes I have been in and seen.....
And now it turns out you are not even Military? You CHOSE to go over there..so stop asking for sympathy...
And we can SUPPORT our troops WITHOUT going over there and being shot at....I personally don't consider you a hero, but a whiner!